Not Feeling Welcomed

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November 13, 2013 at 8:20 pm #19528

Caroline

I have been with my Jewish boyfriend for almost a year now and things are pretty serious. We love each other very much however, when I am around his family I sometimes get very uncomfortable with the things they say in front of me. The very first time I met his sister she went on to talk about her brother-in-law who likes to do some red neck things and she referred to him as a \\\”goy.\\\” She basically said non-jews are all red necks and my boy friends mom went on to yell at her for saying that in front of me and things got extremely awkward. Then the first time I met his brother he said a shiksa joke in front of me which I found to be offensive and it made me question whether or not I am going to be taken seriously in his family. A few weeks later his aunts husband had my boyfriend go to coffee with him to ask him how we would raise our children. I was annoyed because we haven\\\’t been together that long and kids are not on my radar right now. I love my boyfriend so much and am so happy with him but I am a faithful Christian and I respect his Judaism and he is more secular. I have no idea how we would raise our kids but I obviously would like them to be respectful and learn about my faith as well as his. I just don\\\’t know how to go about the in-laws. I definitely feel like an outcast with his family and I\\\’m frustrated because my family has completely embraced my boyfriend and even told him he should teach us about Hannukuh when he is with my family this thanksgiving. They seem to live in a completely Jewish world and only have Jewish friends and family. I don\\\’t know if I should suck it up and hope eventually they accept me or if I should say something to them.

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