Pregnant In Heels: Talk about Religion!

True story: A friend recently came home from visiting her boyfriend’s family and told us about this docu-reality show, Pregnant In Heels, that she’d watched with his mom. We all kind of laughed at the premise (Rosie Pope, a “maternity concierge, fashion designer, and pregnancy guru” coaches women through pregnancy in style). But we were assured that Rosie often makes fun of the women (and their partners) who are far-too-often completely clueless about what having a baby will mean. Next thing we knew, six of us were glued to the TV for the full hour, watching the show (which is now on the DVR recording list).

So I was pleased to hear that interfaith issues were tackled on this week’s episode, “Clueless” (which is still saved for me on my friend’s DVR). I was not impressed to hear that the couple was nearing their due date and had never discussed religion. One person on a message board summarized the couple’s stance succinctly with, “Neither one of us cares about our faith so we had a non-religious wedding ceremony but I’m going to flip [out] if you try to take MY daughter to temple/mass.”

We’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: talk about religion well before your child appears in your lives! Figure out how you’re going to raise them, which role(s) each parent’s religion will play in the lives of your kids and in your home as a whole. And if you’re stuck? Ask us, we’d be happy to point out resources for you.

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2 thoughts on “Pregnant In Heels: Talk about Religion!

  1. I couldn’t agree more! I knew a Jewish woman who married a Catholic man. They told each other that religion would play no part in their lives. This is not possible. (Even people who don’t believe, don’t believe in something) Sure enough, the wife wanted to introduce their boys to her (former) faith. The husband wanted nothing to do with that.
    There are people who say, I will let my child decide what religion, in any, to follow. However, if children are not introduced to any religion, how can they choose?
    I personally do not recommend interfaith marriages because, when you are young & in love, the future is seen only surrounded with the rosy glow of romance.

  2. I’m a product of an interfaith marriage, and I’m also in one.  My father is Jewish and my mother was raised Catholic.  She has since converted to Judaism but while we were growing up, we were exposed to both religions.  We did Christmas and Easter with one set of grandparents and Hanukkah and Passover with the other.  When my brother decided to become a bar mitzvah, we joined a temple and attended services.  I still went home for High Holy days when I was in college.  I identify Jewish and my husband is United Methodist.  We made sure to discuss this before our wedding (mostly secular with a few Jewish inserts) and definitely with kids in mind. Our daughter will also learn about both, as well as the other religions in my family (Buddhist, Catholic, Christian, Hindu) and any other religion I can teach her about.  Being in an interfaith household does require some work, both to balance what you do and teach, but also to find a way to teach a faith when it’s not already woven through everything.  But it gave me an interest in all religions (Cultural Anthropology major, classes in comparative religions) that has led to take classes in my own faith, as well.  I know who I am, and I also value my blended self (I’m half-Mexican, too), and I intend to pass that pride down to my daughter, too.

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