The Next Celebrity Interfaith Couple?

  

It’s uncanny. Almost exactly a year ago – July 31, 2010 – the big news in InterfaithFamily.com’s world was the wedding of Chelsea Clinton and Marc Mezvinsky, and all of the following discussion about the Jewish community’s not very embracing reaction. Now, on August 1, 2011, we may have the next big news for interfaith families. Yes – it’s the finale of
The Bachelorette.

I want to make if very clear that I am too busy dealing with important matters to watch low-brow TV shows like The Bachelorette. However, on what is kind of a “date,” I do accompany my wife as she watches the show. As such, I know that this season’s bachelorette, Ashley, is down to two contenders, Ben and J.P., that she’s going to pick one of them this coming Monday night, and that while Ben seems to be a good person, my favorite is J.P., and well, he’s Jewish.

I remember (only vaguely of course because I’m not really watching) that there was one early mention that J.P., at the time one of many contenders, was Jewish, but nothing else was ever said. In a recent episode when Ashley visited the families of the remaining contenders, J.P.’s mother on Long Island came across as a stereotypical very warm and loving but a little intrusive Jewish mother. Interestingly, there was no mention of religions or religious differences in that episode.

Now the Morton Report has surfaced the issue with The Bachelorette: Will One Contender’s Religion Be an Obstacle? The writer, Pat Fish, says:

Why is this important? Well, religion is something people about to embark on a life together do discuss. Also, some Jewish people discourage mixed marriages though they do tolerate them. Interestingly, I’ve never known J.P. and Ashley to discuss their religious differences, at least not on camera.

I will be very interested to again accompany my wife on Monday night to see how this unfolds. If Ashley picks J.P. I do hope they’ve talked about religion or do so soon, and we’ve got lots of resources that can help them have that discussion. If they end up getting married, we’re here to help, with our Jewish Clergy Officiation Referral Service, our Guide to Wedding Ceremonies for Interfaith Couples, and lots of other weddings resources. And hopefully the Jewish community will take this opportunity to not tolerate, but to embrace, another interfaith couple.

Celebrity Updates: Ivanka and Gwyneth

  

Despite the frequency with which I blog about them, I actually have little care about celebrities’ lives. But they keep coming up in the news, saying things of relevance to intermarriage, interfaith families, so I guess I’ll have to keep blogging…

First, mazal tov to Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner on the birth of their daughter on July 17.

The AP tells us,

Kushner is the owner of the New York Observer newspaper. He and Trump wed in 2009. She converted to Judaism before the wedding.

They’ve named their daughter Arabella Rose. I’m not quite sure where the name fits on the bizarre-celeb-baby-name chart, though it’s certainly saner than ”Alef” (and has been described as “exotic” by Donald Trump).

If you want to follow the goings on in the Trump/Kushner home, Ivanka’s tweeting, starting with this one from Arabella’s second day:

Jared and I are having so much fun playing with our daughter! Arabella Rose is beyond adorable. She’s truly a blessing.

The next update is about Gwyneth Paltrow, a regular feature in our interfaith celebrities column.

An =http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2016674/Gwyneth-Paltrow-Ill-raise-Apple-Moses-Jewish.htmlarticle in the Daily Mail reveals,

She once claimed that she did not believe in religion.

But now Gwyneth Paltrow has revealed she wants to raise her children in the Jewish faith, following an appearance on the ancestry programme Who Do You Think You Are

The American actress, whose late father was Jewish film producer Bruce Paltrow, was moved to discover earlier this year on the show that her family came from a long line of influential East European rabbis.

And this has inspired her to raise daughter Apple, seven, and five-year-old son Moses in a Jewish environment, she told guests of a London event hosted by Jewish charity the Community Security Trust.

Her decision is a far cry from comments she made last year about her experience of being raised as both Jewish and Christian.

‘It was such a nice way to grow up,’ she said, but later added: ‘I don’t believe in religion. I believe in spirituality. Religion is the cause of all the problems in the world.’

Gwyneth, if you need any resources for yourself, your husband or your family, we’re here for you.

Mazal Tov, Natalie and Benjamin!

  

Ok, so the details are vague, but I know you’ve been holding your breath since the Golden Globes, if not earlier, waiting, sitting on the edge of your seat… So here you go:

According to The Telegraph and other sources, Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepied have had their baby!

People magazine, which broke the news, gave no details of where the baby was born or when. A publicist for Portman was unavailable for comment on Wednesday.

Natalie Portmand and fiancé Benjamin Millepied are “celebrating” the birth of their baby boy. I’m guessing we’re still within the first 8 days of his life, as the couple have not yet shared the name with me (or the rest of the press). My theory, in part, is based on some of the other Jewish traditions Portman followed during her pregnancy:

She admitted she stuck to tradition when it came to babies’ births.

” think it’s a Jewish thing to be kind of superstitious,” she said in April. “You don’t do any of the baby stuff before the baby arrives.”

Natalie and Benjamin, if you’re looking for a mohel who’ll work with an interfaith family, just fill out our Clergy Officiation Referral Service form!

Mazal tov to the new family!

UPDATE: June 16 For more, check out Rabbi Jason Miller’s blog post (on his blog or on Huffington Post).

UPDATE: June 20 Feeling a little cheeky, Crushable offers up some name suggestions for Li’l Portman. The bris is scheduled for June 22. We’ll have to wait until then to find out his name…

UPDATE: July 6 We have a name!

A Storahtelling B Mitzvah

  

Last night, I attended a gala celebrating Storahtelling. And it was great*.

If you’re not familiar with Storahtelling, they’re a ritual theatre company, focusing on bringing the Torah, and Judaism, to wider audiences, making it more accessible and relevant today. I didn’t crib that from their mission statement, so allow me to excerpt it here:

Storahtelling restores the Torah Service to its original stature through a revival of the lost craft of the Maven, the traditional storyteller who translated the Hebrew Torah into local language. Rooted in biblical text and ritual practice, Storahtelling uses dramatized interpretations, traditional chanting, orginal music and live interaction to bring Bible off the page and onto the global stage.

The event was great, celebrating Storahtelling’s “b mitzvah,” which, as founding director Amichai Lau-Levie explained, is a “bar mitzvah, a bat mitzvah, a b mitzvah inclusive celebration for all genders.” And what a b mitzvah it was! Storahtelling turned 13, honoring their founding director, their incoming executive director and members of the board.

But what’s a b mitzvah without a little Torah? Jackie Hoffman, Jewish actress and comedian extraordinaire, studied with the Storahtelling staff, learning the Torah parsha that would have been her bat mitzvah parsha when she was a girl (raised Orthodox, Jackie didn’t have the option). She tackled a topic that many shy from: the rape of Dinah.

She broke the story up, making it more palatable, relevant and interesting. She interspersed chanting and discussion – with a healthy dose of humor, of course. (Amichai gave the English translations to Jackie’s Torah chanting on the fly.)

With more than a little (much appreciated) feminism flavoring her words, Jackie gave voice to Dinah. Dinah, the central character of this story, does not have any of her own words in the Bible. So Jackie, channeling Dinah, asked why the women of the Bible were too often chattel, to be swamped and shared amongst the men. She set the scene: Dinah had “two Jewish mothers. Think about that for a moment. And 12 stinky brothers.” She asked why Dinah’s mother was so willing to marry Dinah to the man who had raped her. (“Was she so desperate to see her daughter married, she’d ok a man who would defile her? Oh wait, that’s my mother!”) And she might have relished in her telling of the circumcisions of the men of Shechem: “They were in penis pain for three days!”

But it was an impromptu statement after she finished (and after she accepted her present from the “Sisterhood,” two gay Storahtelling staff) that summarized Storahtelling’s work so perfectly: “I’m a person who hates everything, and I dug this experience hard.”

And that’s just it. For Jackie, it was about bringing in some feminism, giving voice to the silent and suffering Dinah, and wrapping it all up in some jokes. For others, it might be highlighting gay characters or interfaith families, placing the Torah stories in contemporary settings, drawing and singing and acting the stories… bringing them to life. If you have the chance to get to a Storahtelling event, I highly recommend it.

[sub]*The only thing that would have made this night better? Had I gotten my photo taken with the hilarious Jackie Hoffman. And had she performed her Shavuot song, just for me.[/sub]

Why It Matters

  

We spend a lot of time talking, writing, thinking about the whole “who is a Jew” debate around here. 

It’s important, in the context of an organization that welcomes and advocates for interfaith families in the Jewish community, to encourage inclusivity in the definition. 

Why?

Because when a Jewish person chooses to marry someone who is not Jewish, it does not mean they are less of a Jew. Let me repeat that: who we marry does not add or detract from our Jewishness. Converting to Catholicism detracts from one’s Jewishness. Marrying a Catholic does not. 

So when I read in publications that I like (did you see  The Unlikely Emissary or The Other Rosenbergs? They were really good!), a comment that is hateful, exclusionary and promulgating of the view that doing something can make one less of (or not at all) a Jew, it annoys me. 

In the most recent issue of Moment Magazine, they published a comment about a previous article. The article, “The Best Jewish TV Shows of All Time,” January/February 2011, included The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

Should The Daily Show with Jon Stewart have made the list? He is married to a non-Jew, doesn’t belong to a synagogue and doesn’t affiliate with the Jewish community or any Jewish organization. And, as I’m given to understand, his children are not being raised as Jews.

Last time I checked, belonging to a synagogue wasn’t criteria for being a Jew. (If it were, we’d hardly have any Jews in our midst under the age of 40.) And how does the writer know with whom Stewart affiliates?

Allow me to fully own my bias: I’ve been a regular viewer since the early double naughts; there are few episodes I’ve missed. And one of the things I enjoy are Stewart’s Yiddishisms, Jewish jokes and occasional confessions that he doesn’t know much about his religion. (Though his writers clearly do.) His made up Hebrew is fantastic and uber-gutteral. Regardless of the choices he and his wife have made, he is still as much a Jew as any other Jew. And his show certainly deserves to be on a list of great Jewish shows. 

But that’s not really the point (or, at least, the main point). My main point is this: The Jewish community owes it to all of us to be welcoming and inclusive, not to belittle or shame another for how they’ve chosen to practice their religion, and certainly not to claim that folks lose their Jew card if they’re “bad.”

I’d like to see the community working together to squash these views, educating one another on just “who is a Jew,” rather than publishing them. 

Gwyneth Paltrow Discovers Her Roots

  

Our celebrity columnist, Nate Bloom, just gave us a head’s up: This Friday’s episode of Who Do You Think You Are? will follow Gwyneth Paltrow’s exploration of her Jewish ancestry.

The Canadian Jewish News tells us,

Actor Gwyneth Paltrow’s ancestral search, which will be told in a new episode of the NBC TV program Who Do You Think You Are? (WDYTYA),  might not have happened if not for Jewish Records Indexing – Poland (JRI Poland).

Founded by Montrealer Stanley Diamond, JRI-Poland is an online searchable database of 4.2 million records related to Polish Jewry.

The April 1 episode of the celebrity documentary series will feature the Academy Award-winner’s genealogical journey.

And,

The Paltrow roots go back to a long line of rabbis named Paltrowicz from northeastern Poland and the towns of Suwalki, Lomza and nearby shtetls.

“The show’s researchers tapped into into JRI-Poland’s online database as the starting point in documenting Paltrow’s ancestry,” said Diamond.

You can read the full article here.

Or watch the trailer for the Friday, April 1 episode here.

Sheen and Galliano are… Jewish?

  

Wait, what? Now we find out that Charlie Sheen and John Galliano are… Jewish?

The question is: can these revelations be believed? After all, a very clever way to defuse bad press about anti-Semitism would be for the perpetrator to end up being Jewish himself.

That way, he is no longer a racist but merely a self-hating Jew:  a tragic figure with a twisted psychic relationship to his own roots.

Mel Gibson must be kicking himself for not having thought of it first.

On the other hand, maybe this new twist of events is just bizarre enough to be true.

Read more.

Natalie Portman, Hadassah and Dior

  

Though their website doesn’t mention it (yet?), Hadassah just sent out a press release:

NEW YORK – Hadassah, the Women’s Zionist Organization of America, salutes Academy Award-winning actress Natalie Portman for speaking out publicly against John Galliano, Christian Dior’s recently dismissed head designer.  Portman, who endorses Dior’s Miss Dior Cherie perfume, recently used her spotlight from winning this year’s Academy Award for Best Actress for her role in Black Swan to denounce Galliano’s remarks.

It continues…

Hadassah National President Nancy Falchuk released the following statement:

“Natalie Portman has had quite a week; she won the Academy Award for Best Actress, and she proved herself to be a leader in the Jewish community by condemning anti-Semitic comments made by designer John Galliano.  We are proud to have Natalie as a passionate advocate and supporter of Hadassah’s work in the fields of health, medical advancement and Jewish education, advocacy and volunteerism.  We congratulate her not just for her Academy Award, but for her willingness to be a leader and role model for those around her.”

So here’s the question I pose to The Jewish Establishment in general: are we now acknowledging that Jews who have interfaith families (Portman is engaged to Benjamin Millepied, who is not Jewish, and is also pregnant) can be Jewish leaders? Great!

Good to know that denouncing anti-semitism is all it takes to have Jews welcomed back into the community’s good graces.

There were certainly many accounts in the Jewish media and blogosphere and from the Jewish Establishment (Haddassah wasn’t among them) about how Portman had done wrong, had made a mistake, etc., for being in an interfaith relationship. What I find interesting is that a mainstream organization like Hadassah is now clearly saying that intermarried Jews (or engaged-to-be-intermarried Jews) can be leaders in the Jewish community and passionate advocates and supporters of Jewish organizations. Fantastic! We agree. Intermarriage isn’t the be all end all. It’s one decision. And it doesn’t detract from someone’s ability to be an involved, passionate Jew.

Charlie Sheen

  

I admit it: I’m the last person to follow a story about Charlie Sheen. The truth is, I just don’t care. It doesn’t matter to me that his personal life is a mess; that it’s creating a mess in his professional life, though I do feel sorry for the rest of the cast and crew on Two and a Half Men who will get paid less this year as a result of a shortened production schedule; and that the result is creating a mess online, clogging up the series of tubes that make the internet.

But here I am, blogging about Charlie Sheen. Because there’s now two angles that I do find interesting, and relevant to InterfaithFamily.com: Sheen’s ex-wife, Brooke Mueller, is Jewish. His (their) twin boys are Jewish. (Sheen is not Jewish.)

So, first, there’s the rampant anti-semitism in Hollywood, an industry largely run by Jews (at all levels, from actors and writers up to studio executives). And the latest round of drama unfolding for Sheen includes allegations of anti-semitism:

Brooke Mueller, in court documents, has accused Charlie Sheen of sending an anti-semitic text message about his manager, Mark Burg. Mueller alleges that Sheen wrote, “I must execute mark b like the stoopid jew pig that he is.”

Or is Mueller using Sheen’s phone to send messages making him look bad, as Sheen’s (Jewish) former publicist claims?

Is Sheen getting lessons from Mel Gibson (Gibson’s trying to “save” Sheen!)? How does this compare to the John Galliano (Dior) mess? How does the entertainment industry handle this? What are the ramifications (both for Sheen and for the anti-semitic trend in general), if any? Is it possible that Sheen’s former publicist was just trying to protect his former client by claiming that Mueller is somehow using Sheen’s phone to make him look bad when it was Sheen himself doing the dirty work? Sheen is clearly unstable and I think the people in his camp were/are attempting to do damage control at every angle because Sheen is destroying his life. I don’t think we’ve heard the last of the anti-semitism allegations.

The second issue is, what does this mean for the boys? Divorce can be hard enough without a media circus and public scandals. Throwing in anti-semitism (real or alleged) to an interfaith family’s divorce must be confusing, at the very least, for their boys.

Justin Bieber: Honorary Jew?

  
Justin felt that if it was something that Jesus would have said, he wanted to say it as well. (-Jewlicious)

We’re talking, of course, about Justin Bieber saying the Shema before each of his concerts.

But the Biebs isn’t Jewish. His mother, a single parent, is an Evangelical Christian. Before concerts, Bieber and his crew would form a prayer circle. His manager, “Scooter” Braun, and his music director, Dan Kanter, are Jewish.

Bieber’s mother, Pattie Mallette, is a single parent and a devout evangelical Christian. She would lead the prayers, which would end, “In Jesus’ name, Amen.” Scooter, an alumnus of Camp Ramah, along with Bieber’s music director, Dan Kanter, are Jewish; and they decided to add in their own prayer to the circles, the Shema.

If you have a ‘tween girl in your life, or, really, pay attention to the media at all, you know that Bieber’s movie, Never Say Never, opened this weekend. In it,

Bieber is seen reciting the “Shema” prayer in Hebrew prior to the big concert, but the sound is drowned out, and only the most astute listener would be able to figure out what is being said. This scene actually ended up on the “cutting room floor,” but was reinserted into the film at the request of Justin’s mother.

And it’s not just Braun and Kanter reciting it:

By their third pre-concert prayer circle, Justin added his voice to Braun’s and Kanter’s prayer as well. Shocked, Braun asked Justin how he knew the Shema.

Having already cribbed this blog post from Jewlicious rather heavily, I’ll leave you with this final excerpt:

Justin replied that he had looked it up online and memorized it. Justin felt that if it was something that Jesus would have said, he wanted to say it as well. It would also connect him more to his manager. Braun, one of the teen idol’s de facto parents and father figures, explained to him what the prayer meant, the oneness of the Lord, and its centrality to modern Jewish worship. Thus began the tradition of Justin reciting the Shema prior to going on stage. (Of course, one can quibble and argue that in the year zero CE, prayer books were not in use and the order of personal prayers differed from the modern selections and patterns. But who am I to quibble?)

Amen.

For more on this story, check out these other sources.

And, for fun, check out the Biebs joining forces with Kanter at Kanter’s wedding in Toronto (Oct. 2010):

And, if that wasn’t enough…