Shalom. I struggled with that salutation — Iâ€™m a Jew by choice and converted 4 and a half years ago, and the language can still feel clunky at times. I should be able to write that salutation without it raising the hair on my neck, but it does make me feel like an impostor sometimes.
My son, Oliver, is also 4 and a half, and my daughter, Esther, is 2 and a half. They attend a preschool/daycare program at a Jewish Community Center, and last week one of the teachers asked if we were Jewish or not. To be fair, not that many of the kids who attend our JCC seem to be Jewish. So it was kind of the teacher to ask rather than assume. However, I suspected the teacher had made an assumption that we werenâ€™t Jewish becauseâ€¦ well, I could come up with a list of reasons why my family of four is not passing as Jews. But most of those reasons have less to do with other peopleâ€™s perceptions than with my own struggle to assert my place in this faith.
The reason Iâ€™ve decided to become a blogger on the InterfaithFamily Parenting Blog is because I felt confidant in my Jewish faith, in my Jewish marriage, in my Jewish parenting, and in my Jewish practice until my kids started becoming talkative Jewish know-a-lots. Then I realized that there is a major difference between converting to a faith as an adult and being raised in it. That shouldnâ€™t be some huge revelation, I realize, and if my beit dein (rabbinic court) had asked me, â€śWhatâ€™s the difference between converting to a faith and being raised in it?â€ť before my mikveh, I probably could have responded confidently. But as with most things, children make you question a lot of your assumptions, and they keep you honest. This morning my kids were chasing each other around the breakfast table singing the motzi (blessing over bread) at the top of their lungs. In that moment I realized (1) their Jewish experience is going to be different from mine, and (2) we are not imposters. Iâ€™m excited by all the things Iâ€™m learning from these little Jewish know-a-lots, and Iâ€™m glad youâ€™ll come along with me on this journey. Shalom.