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Dear Dr. Paula - Page 1

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Author: InterfaithFamily.com Editor (---.home.net)
Date: 10-04-00 13:22

Post your responses to "Dear Dr. Paula"

Christmas trees.

Author: Doc (---.doe.gov)
Date: 12-01-00 13:05

It took me about three years to get comfortable with the secular symbols of Christmas; trees, holly, etc. Crosses, nativity scenes, etc. are different, and we've agreed to keep those to a minimum. I consider Christmas more a "winter festival" than a truly religious holiday anyway. Easter though, is a whole 'nother story.

Another Response to Alex

Author: Michelle (199.44.198.---)
Date: 12-02-00 00:13

Many years ago, when I was married to my first husband, I insisted that we not have a Christmas tree in my home. I wanted to raise any children we might have as Jews -- which to me, at that time, meant celebrating the holidays that my parents had celebrated with us (Chanuka, Pesach and a very little of the high holidays). In a way, being intermarried meant some things were easier, as the only holiday our parents had in common was Thanksgiving. His parents always got Christmas and Easter, and mine always got Passover.and Chanuka for at least one night each. After we had been married about 4 years there was a time when we could not go home for Christmas. That was the year I decided we could have a tree, so that my husband could have some of his holiday in his home. In a way, it was the part of me that wanted to be a good Jewish wife that made Christmas for my husband.

One of the things that's hard to learn about marriage is that the way we want to express love is not necessarily the way our partner needs to hear it. The loving thing, then, is to give to the person what he or she perceives as loving.

I hope that Alex's fiancee considers herself an ex- or "recovering"Catholic. If being Catholic is important to her, and an important part of who she feels she is, it may be diffeicult for Alex to express his love in the way that she needs to experience it. I expect it would be very painful for her to experience his being offended at how she wants to live in what is her home, too.

Christmas Trees

Author: Wendy (---.on.bellglobal.com)
Date: 12-04-00 11:05

I read with great curiosity the letter regarding having a Christmas Tree in the home during the "holiday season". I was raised in a Christian household. Our Christmas decorating consisted of primarily "secular" items, such as the tree, jingle bells, coloured lights, etc. The tree itself was always intended as a decoration...not a religious item. Indeed, the nativity set was probably the only obvious "Christian" decoration in our home.

It is my understanding that most Christians do not associate the tree as a religious symbol. In fact, it has become more of a symbol of family...ornaments collected over the years that are specific to each family member. Our daughter's collection of Barbie ornaments, for example, are definitely not "Christian". Rather, they intended to celebrate the only girl in our large family.

A dear Jewish friend recently asked me why Christians hang lights up outside during the holdiays. Hanukkah is a celebration of light...but why would Christians celebrate? The Star in the East....was it not the Star of David? I wouldn't tell my Jewish friend that she shouldn't have a decorative tree in her home any more than she would tell me that I could not have twinkling lights decorating the outside of our house.

I must be very confused. I have NEVER associated the tree with anything specifically "Christian". Yes, it is called a "Christmas Tree". Please, help me to understand why it is considered wrong to have a tree in a Jewish home during this "holiday season".

Celebrating Christmas

Author: Marjorie (---.san-francisco-11-12rs.ca.dial-access.att.net)
Date: 12-04-00 17:28

Dear Dr Paula,
Best wishes to Alex & wife to-be during their first holiday season together. It is a time of foreshadowing the many years to come. Alex, allow your wife to-be the same respect you would wish reguarding your different experinces. After all, isn't that difference, part of why you fell in love with her in the first place?

Having grown up in a religious Christian home, our primary symbol was always a navitity scene. It was my privilege to put it up every year. I considered it an honor.It was to remind us, amid all the commercialism, of the reason we celebrate. I was reminded of the love God gave to us, & I was asked to think of what I could do for others without them even knowing of my generousity.

Yes, many years we had a tree from my uncles farm. It was a place to put our gifts for each another. We decorated it with expectation of the joyous time we would have at the many family gatherings during the holidays.

My husband objects to a tree, but accepts my use of the nativity scene. We celebrate Chanukah in the dining room, Christmas in the living room. Both are decrated now with anticipation of the good times to be shared with his family, and my family. For 18 years of married life, our holidays have been holidays of inclusion.

Marjorie

What's wrong with Christmas trees?

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 12-30-00 19:15

I'll bet that this is what they were saying in Jerusalem 2168 years ago:

"Sure, we have a statue of Zeus in our atrium. It's just a cultural symbol. We don't offer sacrifices to it or anything. We just don't want little Telemacus and Iphegenia to feel deprived just because they're Jewish!"

Christmas

Author: Diane Dowd (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: 01-03-01 18:56

Dear Dr. Paula:
My son is engaged to a jewish girl we are Catholic. My son is not particularly religeous so we are looking forward to the jewish wedding.
This nice young lady has come they live in another state for 2 Cristmas`s and has been so gratious I am very religeous and my house shows it.
This year she brought her traveling Menorah and each eveing she lite the candles and said her prayer. My husband even went out to buy candles as she lacked one candle for the lighting.
My thought on people dissing others religeons and their traditions is terrible I respect the Jewish traditions she has and God Bless her she is a good sport to come here and go through mine..
We have christmas tree is said the branches go all year long looking up to heaven.We find a reason for our Holiday to have a religeous meaning.

I have a lot to learn with this young lady I hope to learn I`m looking forward to their wedding and seeing the jewish wedding ceremony my 3 other children will help hold the canopy over them as they get married.
I look at this young women a good partner and loved one for my son.
We`ll manage next I will be looking to this site about children and trying to learn how to incorprate my religeon odds are the babies when they have them will be jewish but their gramma is a big old Catholic and how do I explain it right. Hahahaaha
thank you diane..

In need of advice

Author: Staci (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: 05-29-01 17:58

My name is Staci and I am a 22 year old advertising copywriter in LAS VEGAS. I recently graduated from UNLV where a year ago, I met the guy of my dreams. Jay is perfect for me in every way...he' sweet, devoted, trustworthy, charming and handsome. My parents even adore him. However, Jay and I only recently became a couple because he is a very religious Christian and I am Jewish. This was always an issue from the beginning and kept us apart all this time. Jay finally had to admit he loved me and wanted to be with me because he was tired of pretending he was merely my friend, and we are doing great, but we seem to be ignoring the religion issue which is unhealthy I feel. Everytime I bring it up, Jay insists that we are young and have plenty of time to try and think of a solution to the issue...but we are getting more and more serious and avoiding the fact that Jay cannot accept my religion is tormenting me. I am not a very religious Jewish person but feel connected to it and am very close with my family and want to uphold our traditions and holidays, Jay does not think he can deal with having a "half and half" household if we get married and have kids, but desperately wants some advice from people who have been in this situation so MAYBE we can work this out. Any advice would be most helpful from people who understand my predicament! Please e-mail if possible! Thank-you.

To Staci

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 06-05-01 23:07

So you're 22 and he's "sweet, devoted, trustworthy, charming and handsome." There are thousands of men out there who are "sweet, devoted, trustworthy, charming and handsome;" you just haven't had time yet to meet very many of them. I can tell you as someone who has been married for a longer time that there's more to a successful marriage than finding a "sweet, devoted, trustworthy, charming and handsome" man. My advice to you is that you chalk this relationship up to experience and give yourself the opportunity to meet someone who wants the same kind of family you want.

Second thoughts about Staci's problem

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 06-12-01 09:53

Now that I think of it, how "sweet" or "trustworthy" can any boyfriend be who would deny you the right to pass on your family's precious heritage to your own children?

questions

Author: Erika (---.nyc.rr.com)
Date: 06-12-01 20:29

I was raised Catholic and my religious background is very deep-rooted. My mother even attends Church every single day of her life. I believe in God but wouldn't really consider myself a Catholic, though my mother says I definitely am.
I've been dating a Jewish man for quite a while. His family is not too religious, never attends synagogue, but does celebrate a few holidays.
I've always been interested in different religions and philosophies and have recently become very knowledgable of the Jewish beliefs.
I think I am going to marry this man and will certainly have children. We have talked about what religion we will raise them, if any at all, but have not come to any conclusions. Is it true if I wanted to raise my children Jewish, I would need to convert or they would need to be converted when they are born?
Would it be a bad idea to just teach them about both religions but not actually raise them any one particular religion?

to Erika

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 06-12-01 22:17

Did you read Robin Margolis's advice to intermarried parents? If not, go back to the home page and read it. It is excellent advice. I wish my parents could have read it before they had me.

confused

Author: Ed (---.s136.tnt1.nwhv.ct.dialup.rcn.com)
Date: 07-01-01 23:50

I am a Jewish man in a year-long relationship with a non-religious methodist woman. I was raised as a conservative Jew and I am very proud to be Jewish. I love my girlfriend and am considering asking her to marry me. However, there has been a lot of tension swirling in the background of our relationship because of the religion issue. We have talked about it numerous times and I really don't think she truly understands why Judaism is so important to me (especially because I am not relgious right now). She has agreed to raise Jewish children, however, she is so cynical about all religion I wonder if she could be enthusiastic about it. The only religious thing she wants is a Christmas tree because it reminds her of family and good times. I will be uncomfortable with a tree in my house. In addition, my parents have expressed a deep sadness about the possibility of me marrying a non-Jew, something they never imagined. To be honest, I never thought I would consider it either but I just fell quickly for this lady. My father has threatened to not attend our wedding. This would be very hurtful especially since I have been very close with my father for my entire life. I want to be with her very badly, but I also feel very strongly about preserving Judaism and raising my children as proud Jews. I am really struggling with this. Thanks for any advice.

confused

Author: Ed (---.s136.tnt1.nwhv.ct.dialup.rcn.com)
Date: 07-01-01 23:51

I am a Jewish man in a year-long relationship with a non-religious methodist woman. I was raised as a conservative Jew and I am very proud to be Jewish. I love my girlfriend and am considering asking her to marry me. However, there has been a lot of tension swirling in the background of our relationship because of the religion issue. We have talked about it numerous times and I really don't think she truly understands why Judaism is so important to me (especially because I am not relgious right now). She has agreed to raise Jewish children, however, she is so cynical about all religion I wonder if she could be enthusiastic about it. The only religious thing she wants is a Christmas tree because it reminds her of family and good times. I will be uncomfortable with a tree in my house. In addition, my parents have expressed a deep sadness about the possibility of me marrying a non-Jew, something they never imagined. To be honest, I never thought I would consider it either but I just fell quickly for this lady. My father has threatened to not attend our wedding. This would be very hurtful especially since I have been very close with my father for my entire life. I want to be with her very badly, but I also feel very strongly about preserving Judaism and raising my children as proud Jews. I am really struggling with this. Thanks for any advice.

Author: AtlantaJew (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: 07-04-01 04:47

Dear Ed,
Your situation is exactly like my brother's. Conservative background, proud to be Jewish, "fell" in love, disapproving father. My dad, too, threatened not to go to the wedding, but made it clear that although that action would hurt his son, it would not be a statement against him at all, but against intermarriage.

I admire your strong feelings about preserving Judaism and your intent on raising your children as proud Jews. My brother said the same thing when he married a Catholic. What I'm afraid he didn't ask himself is whether he has a strong desire to see his *grand*children as proud Jews. (To be blunt, the statistics are not in his favor). Hoping to save you anguish 50 years from now, I ask you: Have you asked yourself this question?

With sincere concern,
AtlantaJew

to Ed the Confused

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 07-05-01 00:10

I just found this website, which might help you:

www.whymarryjewish.com

It would certainly provide a healthy balance to the material you find here.

Confused

Author: Ben Ezra (---.ma.us.prserv.net)
Date: 07-05-01 22:52

Dear Ed,

I saw your posting and truly relate to what you are going through. I know you will probably get a lot of advice about this, pro and con. And ultimately, you have to do what you feel is right. There are no easy answers here, and I can appreciate how difficult this must be for you. I can only tell you from my own experience as someone who is intermarried.

No matter what gloss is put on it by some, it is not an easy path, at least if you want to have your Judaism remain in tact for you and especially any children you might have. I can tell you from my experience and many others I have observed that if you are having issues about religion now, even before you have asked this woman to marry you, it is likely to get worse, not better, as time goes on. Generally, issues such as raising the children and the role of religion in the home cause fewer problems and are less complex when they are farther away and less abstract. When you are actually dealing with these issues up close (particularly when you are holding your newborn child in your arms), they will become more immediate and thus create far more conflict.

Some interfaith couples glide through life, mixing surface elements of both religions (Rachel Cowan calls these "inter-holiday" as opposed to interfaith marriages), or practicing nothing in particular. Unfortunately, according to counselors who work in this area, many of the children of these marriages grow up confused about their religious identity (not all, to be sure, but many). But that does not sound like the kind of life you want anyway, since you are concerned about things like a Christmas tree in the home.

You need to consider very carefully the role that you want Judaism to have in your life, not just right now but over the long term. How does your girlfriend fit into this vision? How do kids you might have together fit into this vision? How do your kids' non-Jewish grandparents fit into this vision? Is it very important to you that your kids have a strong Jewish identity, as you do, or will you be content if they wind up having more of a "split" identity? It is important that you don't gloss over any problems you might see when you ask yourself these questions. I have seen people gloss over these problems because they want love to conquer all, only to be forced to deal with the problems in a heartbreaking way down the road. You said that your girlfriend does not understand why being Jewish is so important to you even though you are not religious right now. That is a question you must also answer for yourself, because it says a lot about the role Judaism may play in your life in the future.

Another issue is your girlfriend's religious beliefs, on two levels. First, she does not like religion right now, which sounds like it already is an issue, at least in terms of her understanding your attachment to Judaism. But there is a long-term issue to consider as well. I have know a number of interfaith couples where the non-Jewish spouse did not care at all about religion at the time of the marriage (sometimes even hostile to religion), but it became VERY important later on, sometimes when the kids arrived, sometimes after that. These spouses never would have forseen this at the time of their marriage--but it is not uncommon for religion to play a greater role as one gets older. I know of one woman who was an agnostic when she married her Jewish husband. She agreed to raise any potential kids as Jews. After the kids were born, she became a devout Catholic. She now attends church regularly, and although she remains committed to her promise to raise the children as Jews, she regrets her promise, and the now dual-religion home has made it very hard for the entire family.

Then of course, Judaism may come to play a greater role in your life later on, particularly if you are already committed to your Jewish identity now. This is what happened to me. I was raised as a Reform Jew, and although proud to be Jewish, was not that connected to Judaism at the time of my marriage. Things have changed over the years. I now attend a Conservative synagogue and have become increasingly observant. If someone had predicted this to me even five years ago, I would have laughed and dismissed it as inconceivable. And it has put strains on my relationship that were not there before. So you never know.

I will tell you quite honestly, that if I knew at the time of my marriage what I know now, I would not have married someone of another faith. I actually have heard a number of other intermarried Jews say this, even though they would never confess it to their non-Jewish spouse, who is often unaware of the sentiment. There are, of course, people who will tell you that they know happily intermarried families and that it can be done. It is absolutely true that, in some cases, it can be done successfully. But that is usually where both spouses agree to have one faith in the home, sometimes with one spouse converting. But even when successful, it is always a lot harder and a lot more complex that an in-faith marriage. A quick look at the message boards on this web site reveals people struggling with a whole range of issues that never even come up in an in-faith marriage.

You should know that the divorce rate for intermarried families is, by all accounts, at least 50% higher that that of marriages between Jews (one study found that as many as 75% of interfaith marriages end in divorce). This is not surprising--marriage is so complex to begin with. To add an additional layer of complexity, particularly one that can go to the heart of a person's identity, can sometimes overpower even the most well-intentioned marriage. Virtually everyone marries because they are "in love" and I've never met anyone who married with the expectation that it would end in divorce. But there is a lot more to a successful long-term marriage than that initial feeling of "love", however defined, that first draws people together.

Even among Christians, Catholic-Protestant marriages experience a higher divorce rate than either all-Catholic or all-Protestant marriages. So the implications for a Jewish-Christian marriage are that much greater. Naturally, there are very successful interfaith marriages and very unsuccessful in-faith marriages. Being of the same faith is certainly not the only ingredient in a successful marriage. But if you look at the trends, the odds of success are far lower for interfaith marriages.

It is clear that you care for this person very much. And only you can answer whether you stay or walk away. If you walk away, it will be incredibly difficult, maybe more difficult than you could possibly contemplate right now. But it may be easier than dealing with problems down the road when you are already married and perhaps have kids. (Speaking of kids, because they will not be born of a Jewish mother, if you want them to be recognized as Jewish anywhere outside the Reform movement, you will have to have them converted, something some Conservative Rabbis will do in an interfaith marriage, but Orthodox Rabbis will not. It may not be fair, it may be incredibly frustrating, but it is the reality. And there is nothing worse than for a kid (or an adult) to be told he's not "really Jewish".)

I would suggest seeking the counsel of a qualified Rabbi (or two or three). Many have worked a lot with interfaith couples or prospective couples and can tell you about what they have seen and what works and what doesn't. Also, you may want to look at a web site called www.aish.com (Aish is a Jewish outreach organization). On the Aish web site, there is a section called "Dating". There is a series called "Jessica's Journal". You should go in the archives and start with the part where Jessica meets Rick (I think it's around #20, but not exactly sure) and read through. It is well worth the time it will take. Jessica's Journal is about a Jewish woman who identifies with being Jewish but is not religious, and who dates a non-Jewish man that she truly loves. And it grapples seriously, though humorously, with many of the long-term issues surrounding interfaith dating and interfaith marriage. (I also echo Susan's suggestion in the last post to look at www.whymarryjewish.com).

I know how hard this must be as I have travelled this road and now grapple with this on a daily basis. I wish you the best of luck. The e-mail address you posted does not appear to work. Otherwise, I would have sent this directly to you But if you do post your e-mail, I am happy to discuss any part of this or recommend resources, as the decision you make will truly have an impact on the rest of your life.

to: Ben Ezra

Author: Ronnie Friedland, editor (---.ne.mediaone.net)
Date: 07-17-01 13:02

Dear Ben Ezra,
Thank you for your thoughtful response.

I'd like to contact you to invite you to write for this magazine. Please email me at the above address if you are interested.

All the best,
Ronnie Friedland, Editor

interfaith relationship - troubled engagement

Author: Jill (64.209.222.---)
Date: 08-08-01 10:06

I am a Jewish woman engaged to a Catholic man. When we initially fell in love, I told him that it was important to me for him to know that I wanted to raise my kids Jewish. Initially, he agreed. There have been times in the past (throughout our two years of being together) when he would try to tell me that he was struggling with his decision, but unfortunately I didn't listen. I would cry and this would make him feel for the moment that our love was the only thing that was important and that we would work it out. A few weeks ago, he said that he couldn't marry me. He said that he'd been struggling with this for so long and he just can't do it. After many tears and much heartache we decided we would go for counseling and speak to men/women of the clergy. Thus far, everyone has told us that they feel a child should be raised in a household with one religion, while exposing them to the other...holidays would be celebrated, etc. However, my fiance wants a baptism, first holy communion, catechism (sp?) and other important life cycle events. Unfortunately, I want Jewish life cycle events also. I know that there MUST be couples out there who live this way. Observing both religions. I just don't know how or where to find them. A regional outreach director of a reform Temple informed me of this site. ...I'm hoping I can find some answers. Anything is appreciated. Many, many sincere thanks.

Jill

Author: Susan (---.milwaukee.k12.wi.us)
Date: 08-08-01 11:14

Baptism, first [of presumably subsequent?] communion, and catechism are not mere life cycle events. They are experiences which define an entire way of life, outlook, and set of values. As the child of a Jewish mother and Christian father, I could certainly give you an answer to your question, but I think before I write anything new, you should read what has already be written here. Check all the past issues. Check all the discussion boards. People have tried to do what you're contemplating and there's a lot written here about their experiences.

test of software

Author: InterfaithFamily.com editor (---.ne.mediaone.net)
Date: 09-13-01 11:41

ignore this posting--testing software

painful interfaith story

Author: rose (---.cvx11-bradley.dialup.earthlink.net)
Date: 11-25-01 00:30

I applaud all those who can make an interfaith marriage work. Or even get to the point of commitment, risking it. As someone said above, the divorce rates are certainly higher and anecdotally I know some painful stories.

I had a heart-break facing the fact that a Jewish man I loved would never accept me as good enough to marry. I am culturally Catholic more than religiously so, but would never convert for a man, could never pretend to be something I'm not or to rob myself of my cultural identity. The sad thing is that we were very right for each other. But I could tell he was conflicted about the fact that I was not Jewish. And truth be told, I began to lose respect for him because he was quite passive about it- expressing messages from his family that to me showed he was quite cowardly, unable to stand up and define his identity apart from their expectations. Then one wonders, why start a relationship with a non-Jew? I found that really quite cruel- but perhaps it was a way for him to avoid commitment. And one cannot fight such things.

I have known other non-Jewish women in serious commitments with Jewish men, but to tell you the truth, never saw any successful relationships of those. I mean, some of the women converted, but then they were never good enough. The men in some cases realized they really wanted to re-connect with their lost Jewish heritage and found their wives not to be quite able to provide that- even if they had studied and tried hard to raise their children as Jewish. That is no surprise to me, and I wonder why anyone would take on such a thing. Of course, I wanted to before feeling this reality check that I experienced. And although I do not want to generalize from it, I will never again allow a serious romance to develop with a Jewish man because I fear the same thing would happen.

One thing that jews cannot understand is how culturally insular their community can be- and how absolutely intimidating, judgmental and rejecting to anyone who wants to be included. I mean, who is CHOSEN to be included by virtue of a love-- but who is, in fact, never accepted as good enough.

I wish that jewish parents would teach more tolerance and openness-- especially when raising their sons. Because the important thing is to be happy and not to have such rigid categories around who is good enough or not good enough to love. I seriously think this man that I loved so much has struggled with this burden- and rebelled against it- and fashioned a life of dating non-Jewish women as a way to avoid marriage. It is really quite sad. I've never experienced anything as closed or rejecting as the Jewish culture towards outsiders- and I have lived all over. It taught me to re-examine if I hold any of those judgments -- or why this lesson was given to me. But I have to say that I never would have wanted to change anything about him and my family would have been very happy for me if we got together. Now, I would not have converted, but would have been happy to raise our children jewish if that was his wish. I guess maybe that's naive, too, because I am not Jewish so how could I raise jewish children?

Anyhow, sorry for the cynical note- but I would urge people to be much more realistic about the conflicts before getting serious. There are those cheap self-help romance books that advise you to get through those issues in the first several months of dating. But there are men who will pretend that they have NO issues where religious/cultural difference are concerned- and in fact, they do. One needs to be very alert to the ways a man can hide his conflicts or use a woman who is not of his faith background to avoid commitment or true involvement.

Author: Bryce (---.mpowercom.net)
Date: 11-26-01 11:34

There's no need to look at a Jew's refusal to marry a non-Jew as a case of "she's not good enough for me". Such a Jew, even if he were lacking in moral strength, wouldn't even have married an incredibly righteous woman of the stature of Mother Theresa. There are reasons that have nothing to do with "she's not good enough".

Rose's story

Author: Susan (---.as13.nwbl0.wi.voyager.net)
Date: 11-30-01 13:20

Rose:

I can understand that you are in tremendous pain right now. I am very sorry. The fact that we all have our heart broken at least once probably doesn't in any way lessen what you are feeling. You may have heard this before and not believed it, but let me assure you that your Jewish boyfriend's family's rejection of your Catholicism is not personal. Believe me. Your boyfriend obviously feels that he belongs to something bigger than himself, and he can't see marrying anyone who doesn't also belong to it, no matter how good a person she may be. Some people don't find meaning in their
religion until they become parents. Then they want to pass on their treasured heritage, and to help their own children and future generations understand that meaning as well. As immature and insensitive as your ex-boyfriend may be, it shows a certain level of wisdom on his part to recognize what his values are now, before he gets into a marriage that doesn't meet his needs. Maybe he realizes that marriage is about much more than two people finding love and happiness with each other; it's also about becoming the ancestor of future generations and all that that entails.

Sometimes religion conflicts with romantic choices. It is certainly more comforting if we can tell ourselves it's the religion which is wrong. We may even feel tempted to call the members of that religion names, such as "rigid" or "judgmental" or "intolerant" or "uniformed" or "hysterical" or to try to second-guess their motives for disagreeing with us. That is understandable, but it is not fair. Nor is it fair to dictate to members of another religion what they should or should not believe. How do you think you would feel if a Jew, or Muslim, or atheist showed up on a Christian website to tell the Catholics that they're wrong and that only the Presbyterians are right? Please
remember that you may be dealing with people who have had life experiences about which we really know nothing.

It injures our pride much more, and some people are loathe to hear it, but sometimes it is our romantic choices which are wrong. The high number of failed marriages proves this to be true. You are now free to find a husband with whom you have more in common. I sincerely hope and trust that you will get over the hurt you're feeling now and you will find happiness with the right man.

Ignore, this is just a test.

Author: IFF editor (---.ne.mediaone.net)
Date: 12-18-01 10:49

Ignore, this is just a test.

software test

Author: Ronnie (---.proxy.aol.com)
Date: 02-14-02 11:38

ignore

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