How You Can Make Shabbat: Making the Blessings Before the Meal

Wine

Before both the Friday evening meal and lunchtime on Saturday, there is an opportunity to affirm the holiness of Shabbat through the blessing over wine (Kiddush). This blessing combines the acknowledgment of God's role in feeding people with a blessing for Shabbat and remembering creation and liberation. When you are not yet comfortable saying the blessing in Hebrew, you can recite an English translation of all or part of it.

Many Jews grow up drinking a very sweet wine for Kiddush. Sweet wine isn't necessary, however. Kosher wine makers, who make wine according to Jewish law, have created every variety of dry wine for those who prefer a good table wine. The same blessing that is used for wine can also be made over grape juice.

The Friday evening Kiddush has three parts: a reading of Genesis 1:31-2:3, a short blessing over the wine itself and a longer sanctification of Shabbat. Here is the translation of the entire blessing, with a transliteration of the short blessing over the wine itself:

And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. The heavens and the earth were finished, the whole host of them. And on the seventh day, God completed the work which God had done, and rested on the seventh day from all the work that was done. And God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, for on it God rested from all the work that God had created to do.

Ba-rukh a-ta A-don-ai El-o-hey-nu Mel-ekh ha-o-lam, bo-rey p'ri ha-ga-fen.

Blessed are You, Lord our God, Ruler of the universe, Who creates the fruit of the vine. (A traditional translation.)

Holy One of Blessing, Your Presence fills creation, forming the fruit of the vine. (An alternative translation.)

Blessed are You, Lord our God, Ruler of the universe, who sanctifies us with Your commandments, and has been pleased with us. You have lovingly and willingly given us Your holy Shabbat as an inheritance, in memory of creation, because it is the first day of our holy assemblies, in memory of the exodus from Egypt. Because You have chosen us and made us holy among all people and have willingly and lovingly given us Your holy Shabbat as a heritage. Blessed are You, God, who makes Shabbat holy.

Hand washing

Traditional Jews perform a ritual hand-washing before blessing the bread. This washing does not involve soap, but others take the opportunity to wash their hands for cleanliness purposes at this point, as a modern twist on the custom.

For the ritual washing, the blessing is:

Ba-rukh a-ta A-don-ai El-o-hey-nu Mel-ekh ha-o-olam, a-sher kid-sha-nu b'mitz-vo-tav vitz-i-va-nu al n'ti-lat yad-ay-im.

Blessed are You Lord Our God, Ruler of the Universe, who has sanctified us by your commandments and commanded us about washing hands.

Traditionally, this ritual washing is done with a two handled cup. The cup is filled and the water is poured over first one hand and then the cup is held in the wet hand and poured over the other hand. The hands are dried on a towel while reciting the blessing. It is customary to stay silent until the bread is blessed. The reason behind this is that the rabbis of the Talmud believed that talking after washing one's hands might delay getting to eat the bread.

Challah

A special braided loaf of egg bread is used for Shabbat. In Europe, plain black bread was the daily bread; bread made of white flour with eggs was a treat saved for Shabbat. The blessing over the challah or any bread is often called Ha-Motzi, which means "who brings forth" because it acknowledges God bringing forth bread from the earth by giving us the gift of wheat.

The blessing over the bread is:

Ba-rukh a-ta A-don-ai El-o-hey-nu Mel-ekh ha-o-olam, ha-motz-i lech-em min ha-ar-etz.

Blessed are You, Lord Our God, Ruler of the universe, Who brings forth bread from the earth. (A traditional translation.)

Our praise to You, Adonai our God, Sovereign of the universe, who brings forth bread from the earth. (An alternative translation.)

There are a lot of small customs associated with performing this blessing. The challah is covered with a decorative cloth when the table is set, and it is kept covered until you are ready to bless it. There is a sweet story that maintains that we cover the challah so that it will not be jealous that we blessed the wine first! Some lift the loaf or loaves for the blessing, while others place their hands on the bread while reciting the blessing.

After you've made the blessing, you can slice or tear the bread into pieces and distribute it to your guests. Some people salt it first, a nod to the sacrifices that were done in the ancient Temple. There's also a custom of throwing a piece of bread to each person at the table, instead of passing the bread or pieces around. Another, newer custom is for everyone to say the blessing together while touching the loaf, or touching someone who is touching the bread.

The blessing for the bread covers all the food in your meal.

Family Blessings.

(Usually said after the candle lighting, before the blessings over the wine.)

There are three additional blessings for those people who are most important to us. Whether you use the traditional Hebrew or create your own words of blessing, the tiny moment of exchanging a blessing can strengthen or even rebuild a tense relationship.

For boys: The traditional blessing for sons is based on the blessing given to the sons of Joseph and Asenath his Egyptian wife.

Y'sim-kha El-o-him k'Ef-ra-yim v'chi-Men-ash-e

May God make you like Ephraim and Menashe

For girls: The traditional blessing for daughters lists the four matriarchs.

Y'sim-ekh El-o-him k'Sa-ra, Riv-ka, Ra-chel v'Lei'a

May God make you like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah

For both, continue:

Y'var-ekh'e'kha A-don-ai v'yish-mar-ekh-a
Ya-er A-don-ai pa-nav el-ei-kha vi-chu-nekh-a
Yi-sa A-don-ai pa-nav el-ei-kha v'ya-sem l'kha sha-lom.

May God bless you and keep you
May God shine God's countenance upon you and be gracious to you
May God favor you and give you peace.

You may also choose to substitute family names as in, "May you be like Grandma Sylvia and Bubbie Ann." You may also simply whisper in the ear of each child mentioning something that you love about them, or that they have done or made in the last week.

In any case, the importance lies in the placing of your hands on their head or cheek or the hug and whisper.

For your partner: Traditionally a husband read from the Song of Songs a small book of the bible which contains poems expressing the love of a shepherd and a young woman. This poetry is seen as a symbol of the love of God for the people of Israel. Reading aloud from this sensual poetry gives a strong signal to children of the holiness of a love relationship and the approval Judaism gives to physical love.

All of these prayers are in every siddur (prayerbook). Many will also include traditional songs for singing at the Shabbat table. You can also purchase a bencher from a Jewish bookstore. This is the Yiddish word for a short booklet containing the Shabbat blessings and songs, so-called as they are sung at the table (bench means "table" in Yiddish). Benchers are usually made and distributed to guests at weddings and bar/ bat mitzvahs.

Return to the Guide to Shabbat and Havdalah for Interfaith Families Resource Guide.