A Tribute to Rosanne Levitt

These remarks were delivered on March 31, 2004 at a lunch in honor of Rosanne Levitt's retirement as director of The Interfaith Connection at the Jewish Community Center of San Francisco. We are extremely pleased that Rosanne has become a member of InterfaithFamily.com's Advisory Board.

It is a pleasure to be here today and an honor to be asked to recognize Rosanne Levitt for the positive impact she has had on so many lives these past eighteen years.  

I was raised in the Bay Area in a Reform Jewish home by parents whose activities and contributions to Jewish causes and institutions are too numerous to mention. I attended Hebrew schoool and became Bar Mitzvah. I attended Sunday school and was confirmed. I spent two entire summers at Jewish summer camp. I attended a predominantly Jewish university and traveled to Israel on a UJA singles mission. I belonged to the Jewish community center. Many of my friends are Jews. I support Jewish organizations and care very strongly about Israel and the survival of the Jewish people. I love my Jewish culture and background. First and foremost, I identify myself as a Jew.

Given all of that, I still managed to fall in love with a gentile. My wife Cristina and I were married by a Reform rabbi last June.

Somehow, Judaism was not a prerequisite for me in finding a lifelong mate. From what I understand, neither was it for Moses, or Queen Esther, as they too married out of the faith. So while intermarriage is not a new phenomenon, we all recognize it is a growing one, one that must be considered and addressed.

Rosanne has been a family friend for over twenty years. For the past few years, while my relationship with Cristina was growing in importance, I would see Rosanne at one event or another and she would very casually suggest that Cristina and I should give her a call--that we might have something to gain by speaking with her. My mother also deserves credit here because she regularly suggested that we make an appointment to speak with Rosanne. So, finally, several months prior to our wedding, I got around to calling Rosanne.

As interfaith couples go, Cristina and I are lucky. We aren't interfaith in the usual sense. Cristina was certainly not born or raised Jewish. She was raised a Catholic, but never subscribed to the religion. Furthermore, she has, from the beginning of our relationship, been extremely respectful, interested and active in participating with me and the rest of my family in Jewish gatherings, holidays and life-cycle events.

We didn't have some of the more complicated issues to contend with that perhaps a more typical interfaith couple might face. Nonetheless, we called Rosanne and asked, "What can you offer Cristina and me? We have a healthy, loving relationship. What more do we need?" She explained that a new discussion series was starting soon at the JCC, and she would like to include us. I have to admit, I was reluctant. I was willing to have a meeting with her, but why did I have to give up several evenings to watch other couples wrestle with their interfaith issues? Nonetheless, Cristina and I agreed to attend. At the very least, I knew it would make my mother happy.

Much to my surprise, I found our first meeting stimulating, instructive and completely enjoyable. Here were five other couples at a similar time of life. It immediately became apparent that there was much to gain simply because we had more in common than we had realized. Cristina and I actually began looking forward to our sessions. Most importantly, we had found a community.

Each session included discussions on topics such as: what it means to be Jewish, the reaction of our parents and families to our interfaith relationship, how holidays would be spent, and, perhaps, the most contentious, how we would raise our children. Rosanne provided real insight into these complex and thorny issues in a warm, intelligent and non-judgmental way.

In the one year since our group of six couples became acquainted, one couple ultimately broke up, two were already married and happily remain so, two got married, one got engaged, and now one of the married couples is expecting their first child.

By the end of the series, Cristina and I felt we had made some lifelong friends, In fact, our group continues to get together socially even though we're no longer being counseled by Rosanne. There is always the option of continued support, as it seems every couple of weeks we receive emails for a new class, lecture or some kind of gathering. All in all, our connection to the Jewish community is growing stronger all the time.

Since completing Rosanne's discussion group and getting married, Cristina and I have spent the last several months getting to know new interfaith couples in the East Bay where we now live. We've participated in events at the Berkeley JCC, attended services at East Bay synagogues, become involved with the Jewish federation of the East Bay, and in May we're off to Washington for the annual AIPAC policy conference--all of this because we were made to feel welcome and because Rosanne helped us to develop our identity.

At a major turning point in life, where interfaith couples might completely depart from the Jewish community for good, this program and this community reaches out and establishes that there is a place for us. For Cristina and me, this was very important to hear and to know that my people still have open arms.

Sadly, the rest of the world appears yet again to be turning against the Jews. Anti-Semitism is growing in Europe and most of the Muslim world is vilifying us. Israel's survival is threatened every day. We can hardly afford to turn our backs on one another. Reaching out to interfaith couples is essential. Nearly every interfaith couple I know will be raising Jewish children. Is that not proof enough of the importance and success of programs such as the Interfaith Connection? I strongly urge this community to continue funding and expanding interfaith programming. Our very survival as a people may depend on it.

In the Jewish tradition of tikkun olam, repairing the world, Rosanne's efforts perfectly exemplify how one person can begin to repair the world. Her hard work will be felt for generations.

So, Rosanne, for Cristina and me, as well as Delphine and Alan, Colleen and David, Mary and Brian, Christine and Michael, and for all of the couples you counseled before and after us, we thank you so very much.

Jonathan Wornick lives in the San Francisco East Bay area.