June 5, 2007
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Several years ago, I was the editor of a Jewish magazine in San Diego. At the time I was living with a non-Jewish woman. My co-workers and bosses knew, but I never was sure how those outside my office would react. In many ways, being in an interfaith relationship in the Jewish community is like being gay in a presumptively heterosexual world. People assume you're one thing until you tell them otherwise. And when you do, you brace yourself for a potentially negative reaction.
In the new issue of our Web Magazine on Coming Out About Your Interfaith Relationship, we share perspectives from people who've experienced the good and the bad when they broke the news.
The stories don't get much more heartbreaking than that of Marina Budhos' mother. When she told her Orthodox father that she was marrying an Indian-Caribbean man, he disowned her. Read more in "You Have Shamed Us."
Telling her parents about her non-Jewish boyfriend was easy for Rachel Rockenmacher, but telling her co-workers was a different story. Read more.
When a Jewish woman gets engaged to a Catholic man, she wonders what both sets of parents will think, in Peggy Dorf's The Blessing of Two Mothers.
Julie Wiener was like me. For seven years, she hid the fact of her intermarriage from her co-workers in Jewish journalism. Julie speaks to others like her, in "In the Mix": Coming Out as Intermarried.
Abby Spotts' parents always assumed she'd marry someone Jewish. She probably did too. So it's with a bit of trepidation she and her Catholic fiance go for dinner at her parents' house in The Accidental Intermarriage.
Wondering how to broach the subject with your parents? Read Carol Targum's helpful Tips for Telling Your Parents About Your Interfaith Relationship.
From Our Archives
Madhavi Kushner grew up in an ashram where they studied all religions. Now that she's marrying a Jewish man--and the son of a rabbi, to boot--her family wonders: will she have to wear a wig? Read more in Overcoming Our Religious Differences.
What if the Jewish community saw intermarriage as a way to engage the non-Jewish world--and not as a threat to the Jewish one, asks Rabbi Kerry M. Olitzky in Intermarriage as a Form of Outreach?
Arts and Entertainment
Jewish boy meets non-Jewish girl. Jewish boy and non-Jewish girl go home together. Jewish boy impregnates non-Jewish girl. What next? Read Alizah Salario's review of the new hit comedy Knocked Up .
They tried to make Amy Winehouse go to rehab and she said no, no, no. Now the music/tabloid star is saying to the same to a traditional Jewish wedding after marrying her on-again, off-again boyfriend. Plus, the growing network of Jewish connections in the new French government. Read more in the latest installment of Interfaith Celebrities.
Guess which one is Jewish: nebbishy underground comic legend Ralph Crumb, or his tall leggy wife Aline? Find out in Ilana Arazie's interview with Aline.
Additional Resources on Coming Out About Your Interfaith Relationship
For more on relating to the extended family, see our Marriage and Relationships Resource Page .
What's New on the Blogs
On the IFF Network Blog, we asked, "Who is a Jew? Who Cares?"
Our next issue, on interfaith weddings, is coming out Tuesday, June 19.
Micah Sachs, Online Managing Editor
Write for Us!
We're looking for writers on the following topics:
Interested in any of these topics? Contact Web Magazine Editor Ronnie Friedland at firstname.lastname@example.org .