An addition to what the knowledgeable Rabbi didn’t say:
1) The Bat or Bar Mitzvah ceremony AS IT IS CELEBRATED TODAY is fairly new. The boy ceremony seventy years ago consisted of reciting the Torah blessings, Eating some “Leikach” cake and moving on with life. So basically, the ceremony can be designed within reason placing the boy / girl in the center with as many people Jew or gentile as participants.
2) What the Rabbi wanted to say (but was very careful) is: If you think that your friends and relatives expect participation, you should consider where to have your grand event. Don’t expect all houses of worship to accommodate your wishes even though they seem simple enough: Clergy have to consider their board of directors, congregation regulations, and more. So choose your house of worship carefully.
Check out my site about Bat and Bar Mitzvah study, and join me there.
http://www.batbarmitzvah.webs.comView these samples too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNXKFYe8UOghttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0QC_s-rDQohttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ri1MgllHoyc
